I Tried Every Fast Food Pizza In America

in 2023 Americans spent over $40 billion on fast food pizza over half of that 40 billion was spent on just 12 nationally recognized restaurants the restaurants that we're talking about today aren't just your standard mom and pop so what is fast food pizza these restaurants are called qsrs also known as a quick service restaurant they're Built For Speed and scale are they really that good to consume that much of the market it's high time we find a true king So today we're going to put all these pizzerias to the test to see which one is the best starting with Papa John's this is their classic cheese it just smells like uh close your eyes you're at Chuck-E-Cheese right now smell the ball pit right now now that we're at our first stop let me explain some rules to keep things Fair we're eating two pizzas at every stop a baseline crust with cheese and whatever their most Classic Pizza is we're then going to rate them on the classic internet tier list according to the best experience we had overall so may the best pizzeria win cheers surprising that there's a crunch in that but not much solid start not so solid but just a start this is their pizza with the works we flipped this one over because it fell apart when we were trying to take b-roll of it sometimes when there's too much ingredients even though they're better ingredients better Pizza that happens these are not better ingredients these are the same average ingredients you get at any other godamn pizza shop what in here is better like the pepperoni um no the flavor of both of these pizzas is like if a violinist was like I'm going to play for an arena and then they didn't hook their violin up to the goddamn speaker system what I'm trying to say is the flavor profile of this is pretty low it doesn't taste bad though I wanted to clarify that it tastes good the pizza sauce isn't too sweet but the flavor to me is just lacking smells better than it tastes I wasn't delighted by this experience it was a solid flat c yeah would go see Papa John's C tier moving on we're at Jets Pizza I've never been here before but I do think it's very funny on the boxes that they put so many words I think they did that cuz they couldn't decide what the to say because their slogan is better because it has to be this better be good pizza cuz it has to be it's a Detroit style pizza and this is their classic cheese here we up oh on that burned the out of me I will say it's good this is their super special Detroit style pizza all right well see how special it is it's like Spider-Man hanging dude I didn't like that one as much that tastes like chuckecheese pizza for some reason 100% the cheese one was like 10 times better than the super special whatever but that said cheese quality nice good amount of chew they caramelize it nicely I don't like the sauce it's a little too ketchupy of a sauce for me I feel like if if there was a little more flavor in I'd be happier but maybe the cheese one is different cuz I did really enjoy the cheese I'll give it a solid B+ before I rate this I heard Jets was known for the ranch where they give you a bottle of ranch where was that and then so you just take this guy and you just did that amplify it did it did we're not going to Sauce everything cuz Papa John's has that garlic sauce that gives me even be why did they give us a whole bottle and where was this originally smell it Jet's Pizza B tier moving on here we go we're at Blaze I will say visually this pizza does look better I don't like that there's not much puff in the the crust it feels a little too like commercial pizza but on a positive note the cheese looks legit the toppings aren't falling off like the Papa John's one the dough is noticeably better the next one is some sort of barbecue chicken pizza cheers this one should have been cooked a little bit longer I think the cheese one was took great I do have some critiques the flavor is better and more noticeable but still a little flat I do appreciate that this has a crisp bottom just like me the texture of the dough is a little too chewy I feel like they could pull back the chewi by like 10% but that's just me being a real about it your tongue touches the bottom which has that nice like roasted taste so max my son I've watched him eat pizza and he always eats it upside down I thought it was weird but he has a point all the toppings are on the top your tongue touches the toppings first I mean it's a thin crust pizza but when we're eating it it reminds me more of a flatbread than an actual pizza I want it to be an a it's not as bre as most USR pizzas but it's good it was a B+ you know what I think this is deserving of a solid B tier Little Caesar's number three grossing Pizza in America but it certainly didn't help them with this undercooked flet f pizza now did it $4.4 billion that's what that got you he's mad everyone that's just mush yeah just mushy the dough is not good crazy because the dough is made in a distribution center that they can then make perfect and ship out to all of their individual stores right and even then when they had the opportunity to do so in Mass at scale with all that money they fed it up they didn't put enough salt they didn't put enough sugar how the do you let that happen this is called a three meat treat stuffed crust it's all right it's 100% relying on the saltiness from the Bon at this didn't have all the bacon pepperoni pre-made ingredients that they didn't even make in house on top to save it his pizza would be just as Bland but it tastes good with with the pepperoni and the bacon right that's all you really taste you're not tasting the pizza I'm giving an app I was going to say D+ we'll just average this out to essentially a very very low D congrats you stayed off the bottom of the barrel barely we're at hungry howis supposedly they were the first to invent the flavored Crust Pizza first one we're starting with is just regular cheese no flavor crust cheers it's very ficat like not pizza likee the dough is under salted too that's why they invented the seasoned crust because the dough is just Bland anticipatory yeah peppering pizza with the garlic cheese butter butter crust it does look good smells good I like the crust crust is nice it's good that salty bite I had of the crust was really nice Pepperoni's crispy it actually wasn't crispy it looked crispy but did not have a single crunch yeah everything else on this pizza is very mid I mean out of all the pizzas we've had so far the flavor crust is not saving this for me this is like a SE it's SE moving on we're adding a bonus Pizza the Costco pizza it's too important not to include this okay they definitely don't win in the grossing Department because this is not their main business technically but it's Costco pizza if we didn't include it I feel like we'd get yelled at to be honest with you we've got cheese and pepperoni the only two they offer starting with cheese bada bing bada boom ba oh yeah cheapest pizza in the video tastes identical to many of the pizzas we had so far but look at the ratio of cheese to bread there's so much cheese on this damn all right pepperoni you know what's funny I can barely taste a pepperoni the pepperoni is super subtle as Andy hearnen would have put this pretty unoffensive right it's okay the sauce isn't too sweet it's UND salted though not that flavorful there's a lot of cheese but it doesn't taste like much I mean an overall experience I'm paying $9.99 for one large that's a good point that's a good point for the quality of that price I'm giving this a b b for bang for your butt yeah you know what I agree B Costco I miss the Supreme bring it back Costco good work B tier moving on our next stop is Godfathers in Houston Texas but I'm not going back there unless I absolutely have to so it's time to bring in the big guns hi I'm Maya I'm the head of post production for the channel and I don't usually get out of my little cubby hole in front of my computer jokes on me because apparently it's about to rain so let's hope this pizza is good today I'm going to be trying the classic cheese on original crust all right cheers I say this lovingly but this reminds me of like your cafeteria School pizza from like a nostalgic point of view it's pretty doughy it's also very bready in my opinion there's not as much of a like proportionate ratio of cheese sauce and stove it's just not the pizza that I really would gravitate towards I'll also be trying the classic combo on original crust which features pepperoni beef sausage onions black olives mushrooms and mozzarella cheese this is better than the classic cheese pizza but only because there actually has like more toppings to it there is no difference in terms of like crust or how the actual bread is cooked or baked there are people who really likes this type of pizza who would enjoy more of a bready type of bite to me it's more of a c tier Pizza I'm sorry I feel bad all right we're at Papa Murphy's when I came out with the pizza my first thought was wait a minute this isn't baked it's a taken baked restaurant i' never heard of this before I didn't even know this was a thing but it's done $750 million I guess we don't get to eat it now we have to take it all the way home this is a crazy concept they literally didn't do any of the work they're just like here you go yourself there are baking instructions on this it's just a huge paper plate this can go in the oven leave the pizza on this tray that's concerning 12 to 18 minutes and we'll see you in a second this better be good this is Douro quality this isn't Douro this is the struggle try the other one maybe this will redeem it for me the toppings taste good cuz it's bacon and ranch of course it's going to be good but that's the only thing it has going for it dough sucks this is the freshest dough we've had we've proofed it here and then we baked it fresh that should be the greatest dough that we've had all day and it is by far the very worst dough I've had it's under seasoned it's got that like frozen dour flavor like it just doesn't taste like fresh good quality bread it tastes like plasticky and I taste no yeast in it I will say I like the crunch on the outside that's kind of fun chickens whatever Ranch is okay I had high hopes for this and I really wasn't expecting to dislike as much as I do but I would describe the flavor as almost Hot Pocket like which I guess if you like that that's great but this is a competition of who makes the best pizza not who makes the Hot Pocket It's s in my book this is horrible is an F that's an F I will never do this again we're at Cece's Pizza Chi yeah yeah he's been calling it chees cheese pizza a chees cheese cheese pizza this is uh clearly a frozen crust it's very stiff but not in a good way cheers it's not as Bland as some that we've had texturally it's a nightmare it's so soft no crispness but it is garlicky which I like yeah this is called a zesty pepperoni instead of marinara it's going to be Ranch I don't taste the ranch at all it's also supposed to be brushed with butter and Parmesan I'm not getting any of that it makes sense that they have an all you can eat buffet because it's the only way that they can get rid of the food no one actually wants to buy it so as long as you can just keep eating it for a small price at least they'll get rid of their ingredients look at the Box what did it say here the best pizza value anywhere tell that's a Costco they know their product is so that they won't even say the best pizza they just say the best pizza value we'll give this to you the cheapest mother you'll get this is a solid D for me not an F but a d it's edging the F though so we're at Sparro the original New York Pizza I think a lot of people would be really unhappy about that statement because that's not what this is this is not New York pizza but second off they filed for bankruptcy thankfully they're on a positive upswing today had a gas station next to a jail but I'm not judging Sparrow by that I don't judge a book by its cover I judge it by its taste it starts off with a funk like almost like someone chewed it and spit in your mouth like throw up why would you say that to me that's just my opinion that's just bad it's got shoe but it's not a good shoe it's like a rubber band shoe and there was no salt present period the Supreme version I guess you know this is like bringing down the energy you know what's worse than no flavor bad flavor that's what this has at least you could fix no flavor I don't think you can fix this honestly I think it's an F it's an F but we're not finished we still have a few to go including two of the biggest in the country moving on all right Pizza Hut listen they say no one can out Pizza The Hut but in my opinion everyone has Out Pizza The Hut including me remember that time you commented on my post and you said we have your location Joshua well you never pulled up because you're a bunch of cheese pizza from Pizza you know if I was doing $5.5 billion in Revenue just selling pizza I wouldn't give a about my product cuz that is not good I usually chew my food that was like three bites and it just disappeared it's got a crunch but the inside is just no chew now we're on to their most popular pizza the stuffed crust pepperoni you know funny enough this is better only because it's got so much cheese it tastes exactly how it did back then so they're consistent Pizza should have like a chewy stretchy nice toothsome texture to it with some crispiness on it this has very little crispiness very bready like Wonderbread almost cake likee and the crust is pretty bland I know I'm talking a little bit of mess here but neither of these pizzas taste bad they're just not pizza and this is on the lower end of what a pizza should be sure it tastes good of course I could eat this pizza especially if I was intoxicated the pepperonis are good yeah I was going to say I think the best thing about this one is the pepperoni pepperonis are good I mean that's it this is the exact kind of pizza that Italians look at America and laugh at us for I'm just going to rate it it's a c tier it's below mid so I'm going to give this one a a d oh I forgot there's D tier I meant to say d ultimately this boils down to a d tier moving on we're at chuckecheese and I am shocked this is right underneath sales of Blaze Pizza and as a delivery service over $300 million in sales it's crazy who wakes up and goes oh you know what I'm craving pizza who order chuckecheese I'm afraid to eat this because it's coming from the general vicinity of a bunch of children that are touching all these knobs and I just feel like the people that work there are touching all the stuff that the kids are touching we're going to eat it anyway if I get a stomach virus from this I'm going to be really pissed off it's going to taste like ballpit this tastes like almost nothing this is the closest to cardboard I've ever eaten the sauce is there texturally but the flavor isn't the cheese is there texturally but the flavor is barely there and the dough tastes like nothing normally we'd expect like a sweet sauce or something like that especially since there's kids except the sauce is sort of just not there it might just tomato paste honestly I think tomato paste would be more flavorful than this this is probably going to taste better this is the five meat because it has five meats on it to help carry what is not there would you look at that it tastes like bacon ham and pepperoni which tastes good but the p piz itself there's not after like the fifth CH it all disappears yeah out of all the pizzas that we had today I'm going to give this one a solid fat F it's an F I mean it's Chuck-E-Cheese moving on all right we're at MOD Pizza basically the Chipotle of Pizza in way right this is one of the better looking mods but uh I got one issue we ordered this in a timely manner and it is ice cold at least it's not sweet I appreciate that I don't like the crust at all if you took a a thicker tortilla and put it in their pizza oven with cheese and sauce it would be the same thing it's good it's not great I do like gl's crust better the Mad Dog I kind of like this one flavor on this is really nice I will say so sauce still lackluster crust I don't like it but the flavor of the topping is wonderful kind of like the crust you like the crust not like a flatbread but almost there just a crisp to it versus like a chew Blaze is better but I'm sarting to like this better than Blaze the more I eat it this one's beating the cheese one for sure I like the flavor of meat on there what do you think yeah like the crust grows on you like if this was more of like an ideal Neapolitan style crust I'd be happier with it personally less tortilla like I don't like how thin it is it's not bad the flavor is pretty good I'll give it a b tier overall this is a a pretty B experience not bad MOD Pizza B tier moving on we are at the highest grossing pizza place in the world America in America $9 billion in sales annually what could it possibly be it's a 5x5 deal they still have that I don't think they do but it is Domino's this is probably the most anticipated place right next to Pizza Hut but pizza was a total flop so hopefully Domino's pulls through cheers there is no crust in the world that could save that atrocious sauce that is rough crust by itself not bad it's kind of garlic I like that no pizza purist on planet Earth would verify this crust to be good it's like very very very mid almost below mid but the flavor of it nice I do like that garlic bread flavor the cheese is almost you can't even notice it there's a little bit of like a fake parm flavor which I guess is kind of nice probably on the crust this is their New York slice their most popular cheers texture of the crust is good crust is way better the sauce is not kind is that chewy you're talking about but not too chewy it disintegrates a little too early well look at that it's like a cracker but it was thin this New York style surprised me I didn't think it was going to be that different I thought it were just going to be like oh we put some peppery on it you if I was in New York tasting this like we did in our New York Pizza video where we found the best New York pizza it'd be below mid but it wouldn't be at the bottom of the list the sauce killed this pizza though so honestly all things considered if you like ketchup on your pizza then you'll like this pizza but if you don't it's a solid C tier it's better than Papa John's but it's a c it's not high enough to go to the B territory just because of what we have rated B so this is going to have to fall into the C category all right the big three are all done and we haven't even cracked an a tier yet which brings me to Marco's Pizza could this be our lone a tier I have never even heard of this place and I'm going to be honest on the outside it looks old but I think I might be wrong because this pizza looks like one of the best ones we've had just visually all right the cheese off you do oh yes please wow dude I really like that ratio a good crust to Cheesa sauce ratio the cheese is beautifully Brown and burnished no one gets it that dark on the cheese yeah they care the pepperonis are crisp two kinds of pepperoni I'm kind of hyped about this piz you want me to feed this to you m damn two types of pepperoni is where it's at you got the slightly chewy flat pepperoni and then the crispy cup pepperoni you need that try that crust she's light just so crisp you see what I mean though this is like the type of chew I prefer this is like there's resistance but it melts like a nice steak crisp bottom the dough feels good it's got a little bit of a qsr flavor like it it does still taste kind of like commercialized Pizza piz but the sauce isn't overly sweet it's seasoned nicely it's not like got tons of oregano in there it's nice and balanced the cheese flavor is nice the cheese texture is nice the pepperonis taste perfect Papa John's wishes that they could do this I've never had a qsr pizza that hit me like this sober it's an S tier Pizza fing go that is an S tier Pizza unreal that means that Marcos is the one and only s tier qsr fast food pizza that we had ever had we tried every single one that exists in America and maros somehow stood on top I judged a book by its cover I was wrong I looked at the outside I Saw The Branding and I said this place is stuck in 1972 there's noing way this a good pizza turns out Marcos won the moral of the story is although there was a winner today I would like to ask you to go and support your local pizza places anywhere that's near you ideally maybe a smaller family-owned mom and pop type shop they're probably making number one better pizza number two you're supporting a local business and number three it's good for the local economy all right support those around you avoid the big dogs they're doing just fine God damn how many jobs does bro have side hustle they didn't let me touch the rat I wanted to touch the rat and they said don't touch that so I hit him